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Friday, June 25, 2010

Forgiveness

How do you get people to forgive you?

A couple of months ago, I obviously ticked someone off. This person and I exchanged words for a while. Then this person stopped all communication with me. I did receive an email from this person stating that this person was sorry.

I have sent a couple of messages to this person stating that I am sorry about what happened. I have tried to reconnect with this person. However, this person refuses to reconnect with me.

This hurts me because this person should be part of the family. It makes things weird when I am around other people in this person's family since this person won't accept my apology and move on.

I just wish I knew how to put it all behind us and move on.

Suggestions?


Until next time........

5 Comments from my friends:

Amanda said...

I am in the same situation with a (former) friend. She really cant forgive me and I dont even know why she was upset with me in the first place.

Although, after much thought and prayer, I realize that she wasnt really my friend in the first place. She really liked me! Her words indicated that she had been judging me and my thoughts and my opinions for a long, long time. She said some things that were so hurtful, I literally lost my breath and felt like my heart had been severed in two. But she to hurt me. She knew it would hurt me.

Even to this day I would cry for joy if she wanted to try and be friends again and I would willingly offer her forgiveness (that same forgiveness she has chosen to withhold from me) but I know that wont happen. She just doesnt like me.

I am sorry for rambling... just wanted to share my feelings I guess...

Be blessed-
Amanda

Lynne said...

The hardest part where forgiveness is concerned, is letting go and hopefully, in time the awkward will walk out of the room and you both will be able to find yourself in a place where you are able to communicate with one another again.

I recently felt such pains with someone I thought was my best friend. She just stopped all communication with me. To this day, I can only speculate what caused her to distance herself from me. This all happened at a time in my life that I needed her most. It did hurt, but finally I let it go. We talk now, but it will never quite be the same.

Phyllis said...

This is something I had to learn the hard way...you can't get someone to forgive you. That's something they have to desire and seek on their own. You can apologize for what you've done. You can forgive them for what they've done. But, you'll have to wait for them to forgive you in their own time...praying can help you cope and maybe even understand. Good luck!

Tuesdee Davis - Domestic Diva! said...

Les, I assume you are referring to me...I haven't received the first apology, so not sure where it is being sent to...my email is tcdavis0909@yahoo.com and I know you have my cell phone number, unless you lost it since the last time you text me.

I forgave you the minute I apologized months ago for my words. I am not one to hold a grudge, I never, ever would. God richly blessed me with a forgiving heart, even if no one seeks forgiveness. It almost seems to be a fault of mine.

However, you tend to ruin family situations (ie., throwing a fit at weddings, funerals, dinners...list goes on and on) and it makes me very uncomfortable and it is best we don't share words otherwise. I don't agree with how you treat people. We obviosly don't agree on a lot. So lets agree to disagree. You enjoy your life and I hope it is rich and very blessed, truly!!! I don't like to have stresses in my life and prefer it to be peaceful. Please take no offense. Of course we know you will... you had a cow over Amber's daughters 1st bday, which you blogged about and made it all about you... nonetheless....

I have never made apologies for wanting a care free life and you change people when they are around. When you seek to see how you treat myself and my family, we will talk. Until then, I forgive you, I love you because you married my uncle whom I adore! However, you and I are never going to be friends - sorry :(

Donna1264 said...

After having read and re-read what Domestic Diva has posted, it seems to me, a complete outsider, that maybe both of you are better off staying away from each other.

Until this posting, I had no idea, Leslie, that you'd married Domestic Diva's uncle and it sounds to me there may be some jealousy running rampant amongst the family members. I could be completely incorrect, of course, and apologize if I have stepped on toes.

Remember, this is just an observation on my part, nothing more.

When I married my first cousin (relax, I'm adopted) I was grateful he lived so far away from our families.

Oh sure, it would be nice to be closer for our family reunions (his in July, mine in August). And Christmas and birthdays, etc., but it's nice not having family soooooooooo close.

We do have his parents and my mom stop by on occasion, but mostly my husband, daughter and I are on our own.

You and Domestic Diva can agree to disagree and keep your respectable distances, or you can do a knock down, drag out, no holds barred bickering back and forth.

What you girls do is up to you, but remember, in the end, it is you and Domestic Diva who lose.

JMHO