Thursday, March 25, 2010

When All Is Said And Done

....I still feel numb.

When all is said and done, I know my Grandmother is better off. I know she's walking and talking and looking into the eyes of Jesus. I know that I'll get to see her one day.

However, I'm still a little numb today.

On Monday, we had the funeral for my Grandmother. It was beautiful. I saw friends and family this weekend that I hadn't seen in a long time. That's the best thing about funerals.

But, I'm still numb.

Dad said that he feels like there's a big empty spot in his heart. We all know that it will just take time for the emptiness to go away.

Today, I still feel numb.

Things are getting back to normal. School for Chasity. Work for Tony, Mom, and Dad. Family time. Friends. Church. Girl Scouts. Everything--the whole routine--will be back to "normal" (whatever that is) soon.

It's just that today....I feel numb!

I'm going to miss my Grandmother forever. Right now, I try not to think about it too much. My eyes hurt from crying. Have you ever cried that much? She wouldn't want me to be sad. She's rejoicing! I should be rejoicing too.

Right now though, I'm numb.

It will pass. It just takes time. I'm willing to take that time too!

Until next time........

6 Comments from my friends:

Christine said...

I'm so sorry about the loss of your grandmother. I remember feeling that way too. Both of my grandmothers are gone and I miss them terribly. I'll just be praying for comfort for you.

Thanks for stopping by my community. I'm looking forward to getting to know you through your blog.


Simply Me said...

I'm so sorry about your loss. just found your blog, Love it! New follower!!

Kristina A said...

My grandfather was the only father figure in my life and he passed away 3 years ago. It was that same numb feeling and empty hole that you have. There was a lot of crying, but when I was done crying I remembered the good time and could laugh and smile.

It took a long time for me to smile about it. And I still cry sometimes. God knows how you feel and I don't think He or your grandmother would want you to beat yourself up for grieving. I don't know you're grandmother, but I'm sure she was as special to you as my grandfather was to me.

I'm keeping you and your family in my prayers. Stay strong in the Lord and he will see you through this. Just know it's ok to cry, something I couldn't believe until late after my grandfather passed. I know I've been talking about myself, but personal experience is how I relate to people. I'm so sorry for your loss and pray that you take the time you need to remember the good times. When you are ready, and when God thinks you're ready, you will smile :)


Leslie said...

Thank you guys for your thoughtful comments. Things are going well. I love remembering my Grandmother. She was a very special lady. I really do appreciate all the thoughts and prayers.

Thank you so much!

Donna1264 said...

Leslie, I know exactly how you feel. Losing a loved one is never easy. Take solace in knowing your Grandmother is looking down upon you and misses you too. She would want you to be rejoicing, and you will in your own time. God bless you and your family.

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