Monday, April 10, 2017

What You Say Matters

My mother has told me my entire life that I should try to be kind to people. I shouldn't hurt people's feelings with my words.

I can honestly say I always remember that, but I don't always practice it.

As I sit here today, I wish that other people had been taught the same thing.

Let me just start by saying this...

I am tough. I can handle myself in most situations (as long as there are no dogs involved!).  I can deal with most people. I really do not get hurt easily.


It matters what you say.

Just remember that you don't know everyone!

Even if you have known someone for years, like more than 20, you don't know everything about them. They could be going through things that you never imagined.

I recently had someone ask me when I was going to "get a job" so Tony wouldn't have to work so many hours. 

Let me start with this. This hurt me. I'm not "unemployed" by choice.  Trust me. 

I have been applying for and trying to get jobs since I resigned from my teaching job in June 2015. I have been on interviews, but I don't land the job. I have even applied to WalMart, but they won't hire me!

Now, let me say...

It wouldn't matter if I had a job working 18 hours a day, 7 days a week.  Tony would still have to work whatever hours HIS company says for him to work.  Right now, that happens to be 12 hour days and a few weekends. He has worked (right now) 8 straight days. He will be off for Good Friday this week, so by the time Thursday gets here, it will be 11 straight days. 

That is in no way a record.  He once worked 20 days without a day off.  It's just how it goes.  Sometimes he works every weekend. Other times he doesn't see overtime for 2-3 months in a row!

All I'm saying is that even when I had a full time teaching job, Tony's hours didn't change. They didn't depend on my schedule.  And, they surely didn't work around my schedule! :) 

I guess the point of this rant is this... be careful what you say. Be careful to whom you say it.

When this was said to me, it caught me off guard. It hurt me.

Later, when I was talking to Tony about it, it made me cry. I'm not sure if I was crying because it hurt or because it made me mad. 

Just watch what you say.... it matters!!!

What have you said to someone that hurt them?

What has someone said that hurt you?

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